My kid dropped a dime on me

Yesterday I got a note from Theo's kindergarten teacher. She wanted to let me know that Theo had said "Kick ass!" in class today, and when asked where he'd heard it he said gave me up. Ratted me out. My most pressing question was if he had used the term correctly, but I knew that asking that would only get me in deeper trouble.

So Theo and I had a long discussion about how some words were not ok to say. I told him when he got older he'd be able to decide for himself when a good time was to say those words. I then proceeded to itemize all the words and phrases he's not allowed to say. Ok, that's not true.

At first he started trying to convince me that some random kid in his class made him do it, but I wasn't having any. Then he wanted to know if this was a word he was allowed to say in his room with the door closed. I told him I'd prefer he didn't say it at all. This, of course, was unintended carte blanche to say it in his room with the door closed. Evidently 'prefer' means 'yes, go for it, champ!' in Theo's world. So we had the talk again and this time I laid it on heavier (if I EVER catch you saying that word, you'll be grounded for the remainder of your life).

Theo, of course, has no concept of what 'grounded' means. I'm a bad parent.